In my twenties, I never thought I would need a coach. The thought hadn’t even crossed my mind. But I wish I'd been introduced to the idea much sooner.
I was twenty not that long ago and I look back at it with fondness at the spontaneous choices I made, the journey, the high highs and the lowest of lows as well as the different twists and turns that that decade took. I also look back and wish I had had more guidance not from my peers or parents but from a separate source independent of those who knew me. I would have really appreciated breaking through a few beliefs and blocks that were to continue to hold me back as I moved into my thirties.
Of course we’re given support and dare I say it, practical but not personalised advice from university. But what I am seeing in my clients is the desire to be true to themselves, to feel a sense of purpose and excitement in their life and career and to feel aligned and inspired.
My clients get in touch because of the place where they’re at: it’s a bit heavy and often full of overthinking, overwhelm and stuckness. They realise they need a coach, someone to help them move forward. Someone who they can be challenged by but also completely supported by.
1)Awareness is key
We all have blind spots. We can be great at dishing out advice to our friends, we’re there for them in their time of need but it’s hard to take our own advice. Why? Well we only have one internal experience, no one else thinks or feels like us and we only experience that world. We are all completely unique. We see reactions and responses from everyone around us, but we only see their outward experience. Coaching helps to identify those blind spots, to see the things that we don’t see, to question and challenge unhelpful thinking or patterns that may have emerged. Coaching connects us with our gut and heart, it’s not just about our thoughts. It is like being given the key to unlock the door and our potential. Our current key might not fit the door that we want to go through. A coach offers you the chance for a new set of keys. Metaphors are often a great way of getting to those deeper feelings without explicitly speaking about it.
2)Self-Connection
There are plenty of things in the world that can make us feel disconnected. The internet, the noise, the technology, the comparison, the expectations, the voices of parents, peers, teachers. The list goes on. It has become even noisier in the last 20 years and it is having an effect on our ability to connect, to connect with ourselves and each other and even the world. We need to stay connected, grounded and anchored in ourselves and our choices in order to feel good. When we have that time and space to reflect and connect with ourselves we can then grow, build and nurture better relationships and a brighter and clearer future.
3)Resilience
Having our mindset, beliefs and thoughts challenged in the safe environment of coaching means we can be better equipped to deal with all that external noise. We can start living without comparison and appreciate failing or starting from scratch. Resilience is so much more than just bouncing back from hard times, it is about having the ability to notice, to step back, to make shifts and change directions. It is also about feeling good about investing time and energy into ourselves. Coaching offers those tools and insights.
3)Growth
In the twenties we go from having the emotional support of our family, to wanting to be our own person and find our own way there and in our own time. Somehow we’ve been told that we need to rush this process, that there are certain milestones that need to be reached by a certain age. This is just not true and needs to be We keep growing, we keep evolving and life can go off in a number of wonderful directions, but if we focus on where we should be, we lose the opportunity to connect with where we are now.
4) Next Steps if you need a coach
You might already be thinking where can I find out more? SIGN ME UP! Or maybe the concept of getting started feels really daunting. It doesn’t need to be, because what coaching does best, is it takes the big, uncertain and seemingly impossible and makes it small and manageable. It isn’t waving the magic wand, but it certainly is believing that the wand exists. It is about the small steps, so that you can see noticeable long-lasting changes and that in itself can feel pretty magical.